ShapeShift

December 28, 2010

Falling in Love

Filed under: Spiritual journey — Kathy Jourdain @ 8:54 am

Every single day, usually several times a day, I fall in love.  I fall in love with life itself, with people, with nature, with the earth, with aromas, with my connection to the “invisible” realms, to little intuitive hunches that I have learned to follow, little gestures or offerings from friends and strangers, with things my children say, with people and events who come across my path and walk with me for awhile, with little and big delights that show up every single day.

Sometimes this falling in love catches me by surprise and I catch my breath with the unexpectedness of it.  Sometimes it washes over me like a warm, shimmering shower of energy that grows as it flows.  Sometimes I just feel it in the depth of my being, sinking into it.  Sometimes it comes with joy, sometimes with delight.  But always, always it arrives into my day several times over.

Falling in love is one of the things that has shown up in my life in 2010 with amazing vibrancy.  It never grows old and, like joy, it is a “steady” state – well, as steady as it can be when beauty seeps into your soul and offers out deliciousness to you. I became aware of this when I noticed that joy was pervasive in my space after I moved into my new home in May.  Everyday I would wake up and feel joy.  I will often walk into a room in my house and stop to soak up the feeling love, freedom and peace it brings on in me.  And while it is evident in this physical space, the physical space it is really manifest in is me – and then it’s not about the physical space but about the mind/body/soul connection – heart joining spirit joining reason.

Early in 2010 I had an intense experience with the power of manifestation that blew me away.  It made me alert to the circumstances that contribute to manifesting what I want in my life in positive ways – or as my friend Eddie LeMoine says – you bring about what you think about. I recognize this powerful experience of manifestation as having the following qualities (and I’m sure it is not a complete list):

  • Absolute clarity.  It was so clear that it was grounded deeply in my physical, emotional and spiritual bodies.  I could feel what was wanting to happen with an absolute certainty.
  • Letting go – of the how.  I had felt a bit stuck, some would say trapped, and I couldn’t figure out the how of what I wanted to happen.  That was the real trap.  Because when the clarity of knowing the shift that needed to happen was so strong, I easily let go of the how.  Intellectually I knew that’s what I was supposed to do but actually letting go was almost impossible -to have a real letting go, not an intellectual one.  I had to be willing to surrender fully into the void.  I could not have predicted what happened, how fully it happened or how it surpassed everything I imagined was possible.  But it did!
  • Letting go -  of attachment – those things that were keeping me trapped.  In this case, one thing was my old house.  But there came a time in my heart when I knew it had to let it go.  When it finally went on the market it sold in 24 hours because I had so fully let it go.
  • Expecting what I have already known and witnessed in my life (rather than worrying that this is not true) – that I am fully supported at all times – by the people I can see and touch and by the beings I can feel, “see” in a way and who touch me with shimmers on my skin but I cannot touch them in a physical way.  My life has been a journey in learning they are there, how much they love me, how much they support me and are available to me.
  • Love and joy as a base line emotional and spiritual state.  I am learning that when I waver off of my true state, I become sad, angry, frustrated and skeptical.  These are all clues for me to inquire into what’s happening in my life and experience in any given moment.  When I surface it, it releases and I go back to a steady state of joy and love.

Since early in 2010, I have made this my inquiry and I am aware that as this year flows to its natural end, I am embodying these things in ways that feel grounded, peaceful and clear in guiding a path where I don’t necessarily know the way or the how but I am learning to sense into what is unfolding and then follow the energy, not forcing things to happen, but moving what is already wanting and ready to happen anyway. Trusting – which would be another quality. Kind of like this posting – I felt compelled to write about and celebrate falling in love everyday in every way and only part way through the writing did I discover this is also about manifesting. I don’t know what 2011 will bring and I know I’m not done reflecting on 2010 yet (it was a very BIG year) but I am trusting that this next year will be an experiment in manifestation that will also blow my socks off – as I allow falling in love everyday to shift the shape of my world, my experiences and my relationships.

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19 Comments »

  1. Falling in love with other human beings also takes a willingness to be vulnerable . . . anon-going challenge!

    Comment by Janie — December 28, 2010 @ 2:36 pm

    • Agreed Janie. Being willing and able to be vulnerable was maybe my most challenging learning – saw it as weakness. And it is an on-going learning – which is why I’m glad that I’ve learned emotions are a good sensing tool – even if I don’t always remember it in the beginning of something…

      Comment by Kathy Jourdain — December 28, 2010 @ 10:22 pm

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